


Proximity

by respoftw



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Getting Together, Happy Ending, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-02
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2019-08-16 15:51:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16498511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/respoftw/pseuds/respoftw
Summary: John and Rodney really don't mind the side effects of their latest brush with an Ancient device.Written for the SGA Reverse Bang 2018





	Proximity

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Nonexistenz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonexistenz/gifts).
  * Inspired by [[Art] Proximity](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16496402) by [Nonexistenz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonexistenz/pseuds/Nonexistenz). 



“I don’t think you lads realise just how serious this is.”     
  
John’s head was still pounding from the memory of the pain that had screamed through his skull when he had moved more than six feet away from Rodney. He was abundantly aware of how serious the situation was, he just wasn’t as phased by it as Carson seemed to think he should be.   
  
If Rodney’s epic eye roll was anything to go by, Rodney felt the same way.   
  
“Yes, yes, yes,” Rodney said.  “Seeing as it’s _our_ heads that are trying to split into two, I really think we do but it’s not like it doesn’t have an easy solution.”   
  
“Oh, it does, does it?”  Carson crossed his arms across his chest and raised his eyebrows.  “Well, go on then," he challenged. "Enlighten me.”   
  
Rodney glared, speaking slowly and annunciating every syllable, making it clear how little he thought of Carson’s problem-solving skills.  “Pain equals bad,” he said. “Said pain is caused by being too far away from Colonel Sheppard and said pain stops if we stay in close proximity.  Ergo, we stay in close proximity. _There_ , I’ve enlightened you.”   
  
Carson threw a beseeching look John’s way, clearly expecting John to talk some sense into Rodney, but John just shrugged.  He wasn’t getting pulled into this. Rodney’s suggestion sounded reasonable to him. It was an easy solution and it’s not like it would be forever.  They’d already identified the Ancient device that had whammied them and caused their little proximity problem and Radek was pouring through the database looking for a way to reverse the effects as they spoke.  Besides, John had once spent sixty-two hours trapped in a six-foot by six-foot cell with Rodney, he could handle being in the same room as him for a couple of days.    
  
“Fine,” Carson sighed, sensing defeat.  “But I want you both in here four times a day for tests.”   
  
“ _Four times a day?!_ ” Rodney’s victory smirk morphed into outrage.  “You can’t possibly expect me to drop everything four times a day just to satisfy your vampire-like tendencies.”   
  
“I expect exactly that,” Carson said, crossing his arms back over his chest.  John wondered if someone had once told him it made him look intimidating. Whoever it was, they had lied.  “Of course, if you’d prefer, I could admit you both right now?”   
  
John could tell Rodney was ramping himself up for a rant of epic proportions.  He intercepted it by clamping his hand over Rodney’s mouth to shut him up. Carson may not have been intimidating but he did have the power to make both of their lives extremely miserable.   
  
“Four times a day, doc,” John promised, already dragging Rodney out of the infirmary.   
  
“I am not traipsing up here four times a day,” Rodney said as soon as they were clear of the infirmary and Carson’s ears.   
  
“Yes, you are.  We both are.  Because where I go, you go.  Unless you want to experience that splitting pain again?”   
  
Rodney paled at just the memory of the pain and John felt like a jackass for threatening him with it.  Softening his voice, he nudged closer, knocking Rodney’s arm with his shoulder as they walked. “We’ll figure out a way to fix it.”   
  
“Of course we will,” Rodney replied.  “And until then I have my very own personal lightswitch to work on the backlog of uncategorised items that we’ve been amassing in the labs.”   
  
John groaned.  “Ah, come on Rodney.  You know I hate doing that crap.”   
  
“Well, unless you want me to attempt running through the corridors of Atlantis with you and your merry band of marines - which I absolutely refuse to do by the way - you’re stuck on lightswitch duty.”  Rodney looked way too pleased about that and John considered, just for a moment, forcing Rodney out on manoeuvres with him. As funny as it would be, John knew he would just pay for it later when the forced proximity thing they had going on was done.  Ice cold showers were not something John enjoyed and learning not to piss off the man who could see to it that your shower never ran hot again was one of the first lessons any new resident of Atlantis learned.   
  
“Fine,” he grumbled.  “Lightswitch duty it is.  But you better cough up some of the good coffee.”   
  


* * *

  
Rodney did cough up some of the good coffee - precisely one cupful before switching John back to Folgers.  Honestly, it was more than John expected.   
  
The entire afternoon was more than John expected - better than John expected.  Normally when he played lightswitch Rodney left him in the care of someone else, professing himself to be far too important to be dealing with the categorisation of ancient items - although he always left strict instructions that they were to call for him if they found something cool.  John’s permission to decide what was cool had been taken away after the time he had called Rodney in to show him the ancient equivalent of nose hair clippers although John had noticed that Rodney had taken the clippers with him after he was done yelling.   
  
Rodney didn’t have a choice this time though.  The distance between the storeroom they used to house the ancient items was much too far from the main lab for them to even consider splitting up so Rodney was forced to play data entry clerk for John’s lightswitch findings.     
  
Like a lot of things in Atlantis (staff meetings, Movie night, chess), playing lightswitch was a hell of a lot more fun with Rodney.  In fact, it was so much fun that John had completely forgotten about the forced part of it until Teyla and Ronon came by to see how they were doing.   
  
“You killed him yet?” Ronon asked, peering into one of the opened boxes on the desk.     
  
“Not yet,” Rodney said, sliding the box out of Ronon’s reach and glaring pointedly at him.   
  
Ronon stepped back, amused.  “Yeah, you definitely weren’t the one I was asking that to,” he said.   
  
John snickered as Rodney sputtered in outrage that was probably half feigned.  Ronon and Rodney seemed to obtain great pleasure from winding each other up but John knew that neither one of them would hesitate to put their life on the line for the other - no matter how it looked to someone who may not know them.     
  
“We’re good,” John said to Ronon.  “Another dead one,” he shifted his attention back to Rodney as he tossed the oblong shaped device he had been toying with into the box they’d marked as spare parts.  It was twice as full as the ‘useful’ box.    
  
“What a waste of a day.” Rodney sighed heavily, rubbing at his temples.  “If Radek hasn’t fixed this thing,” he motioned between the two of them with his hand, “by tomorrow then we need to find something else to do.”   
  
“Perhaps you should both take the day off,” Teyla suggested. “Dr Beckett seemed most concerned about the possible side effects of your incident this morning.”   
  
Rodney looked like he was about to say a few choice words about the thoughts of Dr Beckett - possibly involving the words voodoo practitioner and sheep fancier - so John cut him off before he could get a head of steam going.   
  
“We’ve already agreed to keep Carson updated.  If Rodney or I so much as sneeze funny we’ll go and see him but, honestly, we’re good.  Being in the same room seems to be working so far and I’m sure Radek will figure it out soon.”   
  
“It’d be sooner if I was allowed to help,” Rodney muttered.     
  
“Why aren’t you?” Ronon asked, grinning as Rodney rolled his eyes.   
  
“Blame the Colonel here,” he said with a wave of his hand.  “If he gets so much as within ten feet of the thing that did this it activates and since we need the device turned off to study it and since I can’t be more than six feet from him without my head trying to crack itself open....you see the problem.”   
  
“Six feet, huh?” Ronon pointedly looked at how close they were sitting which, ok, John would admit that it was a bit closer than six feet but that was just for ease, so they could look at the devices together.  It was only when Rodney squirmed under Ronon’s gaze that he realised that they had been sitting close enough that their thighs were pressed together under the desk.   
  
_ Huh. _   
  
“Yes, well, if you’re about done some of us have work to do.”  Rodney snapped.   
  
“We had hoped you would join us for dinner,” Teyla said before Ronon and Rodney could start hissing at each other again.  “It is already past six.”   
  
“I had no idea it was that late,” John said.  “Whatta ya say, buddy? Want to call it a night?”     
  
“May as well.”  Rodney stood up and stretched, the muscles of his back popping painfully.  “We can go and find Radek afterwards, see just how useless he’s been without my help.”   
  
“That’s the spirit,” John said sarcastically.  He clapped Rodney on the back as they moved out of the storeroom and left his hand resting there as they walked to the nearest transporter.  Rodney glanced at his hand momentarily but didn’t comment. Maybe, like John, he realised that it was an expedient way to ensure that they wouldn’t accidentally separate on the walk.  Ronon coughed something he couldn’t quite make out under his breath but John ignored him. It was no doubt another snark at Rodney.   
  
They made it to the transporter without incident but Ronon couldn’t resist another jab at Rodney as the transporter doors closed.   
  
“So, McKay, should I pick you both up from Sheppard’s room for our run tomorrow?”   
  
“Oh, no.  No way am I running with you.  John, tell him!”   


* * *

  
Dinner, once John had convinced Rodney that he was perfectly ok with skipping his morning run until this thing was fixed, was pleasant.  John kept his hand on Rodney’s back as they stood in line for their food which felt much more intimate than it had when it had just been the four of them.  His eyes darted left and right, prepped for having to make with the explanations and do some damage control but no one even batted an eyelid.    
  
John guessed that everyone must have heard about their little mishap - the Atlantis rumour mill was as efficient as ever - but he had still expected at least...well, he wasn’t sure what _exactly_ he expected but it wasn’t the complete lack of reaction that was currently happening around them.     
  
“Please,” Rodney had scoffed through a mouth of mashed potatoes when John mentioned it, “our little proximity problem would barely make headlines around here.  You do realise we’re on Atlantis? Just this past month we’ve had a Male pregnancy, a sex pollen epidemic and that incident with the mead from PX5-CR6 that turned all the botanists into three-year-olds.”   
  
When it was put like that, John felt a little silly for being worried.     
  
After dinner, they had stopped by the labs to pester Zelenka who used a lot of words, both Czech and English, to say that he hadn’t made any real progress in fixing whatever the device did to them.  Rodney did his best to work up a full head of steam about it but John could tell his heart wasn’t in it and dragged him out of there before Zelenka could ask what was wrong.   
  
A quick trip to let Carson draw more blood and shine his penlight in their eyes and then they found themselves having to decide whose quarters to sleep in.   
  
Rodney’s prescription mattress won out and John soon found himself leaning against Rodney’s doorframe while Rodney picked MRE trays and dirty boxers off the floor.     
  
“You know, it’s not too late to go to my room instead,” John said, his nose wrinkling distastefully.  Weren’t geniuses supposed to be orderly?   
  
“What? And have Johnny Cash glowering at me while I’m trying to sleep?  No thank you. It's not like it’s that bad in here.”   
  
Rodney would probably have a better chance of convincing John of that if he hadn’t been holding a very stiff pair of socks in his hand when he said it.     
  
Watching Rodney putter around his own room, going through the motions of getting ready for bed, John was surprised at how awkward he felt.  They had shared sleeping space offworld more times than John could count, in both better and worse accommodations than this, but there was something weirdly intimate in getting ready to sleep next to each other in more familiar surroundings.   
  
Those were  _ Rodney’s _ sheets on the bed, it was  _ Rodney’s _ toothpaste that he would have to squeeze onto his toothbrush.  Jesus, that was Rodney’s fricking  _ jerking off sock _ that had just been thrown in the corner.  For the first time since that device had zapped them and forced them together, John felt uncomfortable.   
  
“Ok, so,” Rodney looked around the room which was marginally cleaner than it had been a minute ago.  “Does the room meet with your delicate sensibilities now, Colonel?”   
  
And just like that, John was reminded that this was Rodney.  This was _him_ _and Rodney_. They could do this for however long it took Zelenka to fix them.   
  
John jumped onto Rodney’s bed, sprawling over it like a starfish.  “Yeah,” he grinned, enjoying Rodney’s amused sputter. “This’ll do nicely.”   
  


* * *

  
They didn’t need to share a bed that night, the distance between Rodney’s bed and the one clear patch of floor that John could stretch out on was well within their six-foot limit but sleeping on the floor didn’t even cross John’s mind.  Rodney’s easy acceptance of John’s presence in his bed told him that it hadn’t crossed Rodney’s mind either.

They had shared a bed before of course.  It was probably a bit pathetic that John had spent more nights in the same bed as Rodney over the past two years than he had with his wife during their entire marriage.  Being deployed on various missions for a little more than half of those three years contributed to that but it was still a startling statistic. Sleeping next to Rodney felt familiar while sleeping next to Nancy had...well, it hadn’t ever got to that point.

Rodney’s body threw off heat as he slept, keeping John warm in even the coldest of offworld campsites.  It would be too much in the climate-controlled rooms of Atlantis so John mentally adjusted the temperature in Rodney’s room down by a few degrees as he was crawling into bed.  Rodney grumbled automatically at the sudden chill but he settled within seconds, his mouth curving upwards into a slight smile the way it always did when his head hit the pillow after a long day.

Rodney’s bed - all of the beds on Atlantis really - was too narrow for two grown men to fit on at the same time but they had slept in close quarters before and they managed to find a position that worked with minimal fussing.

It was the best sleep John had gotten in weeks.

Between one blink and the next, morning came, bringing with it the urgent need to relieve his bladder.  John groaned softly, grudging the need to move from the warm bed. Looking at the slightly ajar bathroom door, he judged it to be just about within their six-foot limit which at least meant he didn’t need to wake Rodney.  

Rodney’s head lay on John’s chest, obviously having mistaken him for a pillow at some point during the night, and John moved gingerly, trying his best not to disturb him.  It took a bit of work but he managed to extricate himself from Rodney successfully and headed toward the bathroom, stifling a yawn as he went.

When his bladder was no longer screaming at him, John washed his hands at the sink and caught sight of Rodney’s watch folded neatly on the counter with the clock face up.  It was later than he’d thought - well past the time that Ronon would normally have collected him for their morning run. Not seeing any point to going back to bed, John decided that a shower was in order and walked the few steps to the shower enclosure, the water already turning on in answer to his thoughts.

Those few steps were evidently just enough to take him over the six-foot limit.  It wasn’t the crippling pain of yesterday but between one step and the next, a low-grade headache set up home just above John’s right eye.  It was ignorable for the moment so John decided to continue with his shower, stripping off the blue-striped boxers and the black tee that he’d slept in and stepping under the spray.

He’d barely got his hair wet when Rodney came blundering into the bathroom, his hair sticking up in every direction and sleep stubble on his chin.  He stopped, stock still, when he saw John, his mouth dropping open.

“You’re naked,” he said, accusingly.

“I’m  _ showering _ ,” John drawled out in reply.  “I don’t know about you but I find that the whole getting clean thing works better that way.”

Rodney couldn’t really argue with that.  “My head hurts,” he said instead.

John grimaced sympathetically.  “Yeah, mine too. It isn’t too bad though and you were sleeping so I figured it would be ok.”

“Oh, you did, did you?  Well, not all of us are as cavalier about our brains as you so evidently are.  My brain cells could be dying right now, just because you couldn’t wait five minutes to shower.”  

Rodney’s rant probably would have been more effective if he weren’t delivering it to the bathroom floor, completely unable to look at John.  

“Well, you’re here now,” John said, lathering up the soap.  “So sit down, shut up, and gimme five minutes would ya?”

“Sit down?!” Rodney squeaked.  “You just expect me to sit here while you...while you…”

“While I _shower_ , yes.”  John tried hard to keep the amusement out of his voice. 

Rodney grumbled incoherently but settled himself on the closed toilet seat, facing resolutely in the opposite direction from the shower.

Grinning, John got back to the task of cleaning up and had almost forgotten Rodney was there.  It wasn’t until he turned around to angle his neck under the spray to rinse the suds off that he saw Rodney watching him in the mirror.  Their eyes met and Rodney coloured, dropping his gaze immediately. John felt a bit flushed himself and turned around so he was facing the other way while he turned the water off, taking the time to think unappealing thoughts.

Rodney was off limits.  John knew that. It didn’t mean he had to like it.

Once he had talked himself down, he wrapped himself in a towel before he left the shower enclosure and gestured for Rodney to take his place.  

“What?  With you just standing there?” Rodney asked.

“Well, I would leave but we’ve got to think about your brain cells,” John said.

“Fine.”  Rodney stood up, his movements tight with anger, and yanked his t-shirt off, throwing it to the floor.  The red flush of Rodney’s cheeks carried downwards to the top of his chest, turning blotchy as it travelled further south.  

He stood there for a moment, clad only in his boxers as if he expected John to go running for the door at the sight.  John made himself comfortable, leaning against the doorframe, watching Rodney much more blatantly than Rodney had watched him.

After all, a little looking had never hurt anyone.

Rodney’s anger started to retreat as it became clear that John wasn’t leaving, replaced with something that John couldn’t quite put his finger on.  He’d have said it was vulnerability, but that was crazy. Rodney was one of the least vulnerable people John had ever met. Still, when Rodney started to push the waistband of his boxers down, vulnerable was the only word that jumped into John’s mind.  

Rodney’s boxers hit the floor with a soft thwap and John could see his hands twitch, already half moving to cover himself but he stood straight, leaving himself open to John’s gaze.

John had seen Rodney naked before but only fleetingly.  A flash of skin as he changed off-world, a streak of pale flesh in the corner of his eye as they showered in the locker rooms.  Never like this.

John had always known that Rodney’s shoulders and arms were strong but he’d never noticed the strength in his thighs before.  The broad muscle was incongruous against the pale softness of Rodney’s belly, the vulnerability in Rodney’s blue eyes and John couldn’t stop looking.

Rodney’s cock, soft and pink at first, started to fill, flushing darker, as John continued to look.  It was enough to make John’s mouth water. Rodney saw something - the want probably - in John’s face and that horrible, vulnerable look was replaced with something more like wonder instead.

John forgot all about what was _allowed_ and took a step forward, his mouth dry, his hands clammy and - - 

“Colonel Sheppard, Dr McKay, please respond.”

John cursed as Elizabeth’s voice sounded across the city-wide channel.  Talk about a cock block. He pulled himself away from Rodney and backtracked to the bedroom, locating his radio and pushing it into his ear, turning it to the command channel, pulling fresh boxers that were a little loose on him - probably Rodney’s - as he went.  He couldn’t speak to Elizabeth in just a towel.  There was no way she would know but it would have felt perverse anyway.

“I’m here, Elizabeth,” he said, his voice sounding more strained than he would have liked.  

“John,” Elizabeth sounded relieved. “Is everything all right?  We were trying to contact you and Rodney by radio but there was no answer.  After the accident yesterday, you can understand why we were concerned.”

John could hear the water running in the bathroom, Rodney’s shower starting up, and sighed, the mood killed completely. He sat on Rodney’s bed and started to rub his discarded towel through his hair.  “We’re fine,” he said. “We were in the shower.”

Too late, he realised how that sounded.  He could almost hear Elizabeth’s shocked blush over the radio.

“Showering,” she said.  “Of course. I, ah, well, I should have realised that your little problem would necessitate...well, as long as you are both all right.”

“We’re fine,” John said again.  It was the truth. The low-grade headache from earlier that had disappeared completely when Rodney came into the bathroom had reappeared now that they were apart again.  Despite Rodney’s concern over his brain cells, the headache was barely a blip on the pain meter, and a million miles better than yesterday’s bone-splitting pain. 

Funny how that knowledge didn’t fill John with relief.

“Well, good,” Elizabeth said, jolting John from his thoughts.  “I know you were supposed to see Carson this morning but we had a slight accident off-world last night and he was up most of the night.  He’s asked if you and Rodney wouldn’t mind rescheduling your checkup until after lunch.”

“What kind of accident? Anything I can help with?”  John was already half-dressed and ready to mobilise the troops.

“I believe Sergeant Moore fell into a hole,” Elizabeth said, her voice hiding a smile.  “And took two of his team members down with him. I think their pride is hurt more than anything else but Carson and his team had to attend the site to help them all home.”

John relaxed, glad that it wasn’t anything serious, already planning on how to tease Sgt Moore about his lack of gracefulness.  “Tell Carson to get some sleep and we’ll see him after lunch.”

“Thank you, John.  I’ll let you and Rodney get back to your day.”

John was pulling the radio out of his ear when Rodney came out of the bathroom, fully dressed.  John hadn’t even seen him take clothes in with him and he felt a flash of disappointment course through him.

“Our appointment with Carson has been moved to after lunch,” he said.

Rodney nodded, fiddling with the fastening on his watch.  “And our plans until then? I’m not sure I can face another day watching you play lightswitch.  Do you have paperwork or something? Does the military even have paperwork?”

Rodney was obviously trying to play it as if nothing had happened - or almost happened - in the bathroom which wasn’t entirely unexpected.  John was willing to play along - for now.  Anything to keep from having to discuss his  feelings for a little longer.  It was the John Sheppard way.

“That’s what Lorne’s for,” he joked.  “But I  _ was  _ supposed to meet him this afternoon to discuss the team rotas.  The morning’s yours if you want it.”

Rodney nodded again.  “I suppose you could make yourself useful enough in the labs,” he said grudgingly.  

“Well, I did pass the Mensa test,” John teased, just to see Rodney glower.   Mentioning that never failed to set Rodney’s teeth on edge. Rodney’s glower seemed to ease the tension in the room and they were back to playfully sniping at each other by the time John was dressed.

They detoured to the mess hall for a quick breakfast before arriving at Rodney’s labs.  The late start meant that the labs were already busy but space was quickly made for both John and Rodney, two cups of coffee - the good kind - appearing as if by magic.  

Rodney set John to work checking Dr Barnes’ math on the improvements for the naquadah generators and the two of them worked in companionable silence for the rest of the morning, the silence only occasionally interrupted by Rodney berating his employees or demanding more coffee.  The first time John highlighted an error in the proofs he was checking, Rodney had beamed at him. John ducked his head, feeling more self-conscious about that than he had when he’d caught Rodney looking at him in the shower that morning.

John had forgotten how absorbing exercising his brain could be.  It was incredibly easy to see how Rodney got so caught up in work that he missed lunch most days.  It was only when the little Japanese scientist - Kusanagi, John thought her name was - came by with two sandwiches, one beef, one turkey, that he realised the time.  They had just enough time to scarf the meal down before they had to leave to keep their appointment with Carson. 

“Ah, there you are.  I thought we were going to have to call you on the citywide again.”  Carson ushered them both to sit on neighbouring beds, pulling a curtain around them.  “Any more problems?”

John expected Rodney to start jabbering about the lessening pain from that morning but he remained silent.  Frowning, John hedged his bets. “Nothing new.”

“Aye, well, Radek claims he’s getting closer to figuring things out but it doesnae look like there’ll be a fix on that side of things any time soon.  I’ll just take a wee bit more blood from the both of you and we’ll see what’s what, alright?”

John held his arm out obediently while Rodney muttered about vampiric tendencies.  Once Carson had the vials of blood he left them alone, promising to be back in a jiffy - whatever that was.  

John shifted on the bed, holding a cotton ball against the crook of his elbow.  He didn’t know much about medicine and even less about the effects of Ancient technology on blood work but Carson had claimed to have seen something in their blood yesterday and John couldn’t help but wonder if he would see the absence of that same something today.

He and Rodney had stuck close together all day, walking down the halls with John’s hand on the small of Rodney’s back, sitting pressed together in the mess hall and in the labs, but their relative ease at being apart this morning suggested to John that whatever had happened to them was sorting itself out naturally.  

After the past morning, he really wasn’t ready for that.  The morning was...it was the closest he and Rodney had ever gotten to addressing this thing between them, the thing that had been there since Antarctica, the thing that neither one of them had ever spoken about before.  John had spent so long persuading himself he couldn’t have this that he’d convinced himself it was true. To have come so close that  morning...John wasn’t sure that he could go back to denying it.

In a weird way, this proximity thing of theirs was forcing them to deal with it and - perhaps more crucially - letting John touch Rodney without the rest of the expedition blinking an eye.

He wasn’t ready for it to be over.

He could tell from the happy look on Carson’s face that he was right.  

“Good news,” Carson beamed, “the protein marker in your blood has started to break down.  I would hazard a guess that the two of you could safely put some more distance between you and if things continue on the same track it’ll be completely gone by tomorrow.”

John tried his best to plaster on a smile, a shield that hid the fact that this was bad news,  but he was stopped from having to fake happiness by Rodney’s unexpected outburst.

“Well,” Rodney snapped, “that just goes to show you that your medical degree isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on.”

Carson sighed.  “And what do you mean by that?”

“I mean,” Rodney said, “that the pain is still there.  Look, watch,” Rodney stood up and walked a few feet away from John before crumpling in agony, a cry of pain escaping him.  It was so convincing that John was half off the bed to help him before he realised what Rodney was doing. Quickly, he put his own head in his hands and mumbled a moan of pain that he hoped was convincing.  Thankfully, he was usually more stoic than Rodney when it came to pain because there was no way he could pull of the agony that Rodney was so convincingly conveying.

Carson was certainly convinced if the way he rushed over and called for a nurse was any suggestion.  Carson and Nurse Marie managed to get Rodney on to the bed beside John where Rodney’s pain filled cries finally stopped.   

John reached out and squeezed Rodney’s hand, hoping it would look comforting but really trying to convey through touch ‘ _ what the hell are you doing’ _ .

Rodney squeezed back -  _ just follow my lead _ .

“I don’t understand it,” Carson said, bewildered.  “The protein markers - -”

“Were possibly another side effect of the beam that was in no way related to the pain,” Rodney interrupted.  “It’s much more likely that the pain is related to the neural pathways anyway. Most Ancient technology does have a mental component, you know.”

“Aye, you’re right,” Carson sighed.  “I’m sorry lads, looks like you’re stuck with other a wee bit longer until we get to the bottom of this.”

John bit back a grin.

“That’s ok Carson,” he said.  “We know you’re trying your best.”

* * *

Carson kept them in the infirmary for the rest of the afternoon, running scan after scan and test after test in an effort to determine the root cause of their pain.  It was almost enough to make John regret lying.

Carson’s face as he let them both go for the night - frazzled, bewildered and guilty - made John fell like an ass for going along with Rodney’s plan but then Rodney grabbed his wrist with one of his large, calloused hands, pulling him out of the infirmary and into the corridor, and John would have followed him anywhere.  With a small wave at Carson, he let Rodney pull him to the nearest transporter.

John had radioed Lorne an hour into their battery of tests to let him know that they would need to reschedule their meeting so he didn't make any comment when the transporter deposited them near Rodney’s quarters.  In fact, neither of them had uttered a word since leaving the infirmary. John wanted to ask Rodney what the hell he had been thinking but the corridors of Atlantis didn’t seem the right place for that conversation.  John waited, biding his time until they safely reached the solitude of Rodney’s room.

As soon as the door slid closed behind them, John pulled his wrist from Rodney’s hand.  “Do you wanna tell me what the theatrics back there was about?” he asked, rubbing at his wrist, the air on it feeling cool after the warmth of Rodney’s hand was gone.

“I won a Sears Drama award when I was a kid, did you know that?”  Rodney mused. “I could have made a career of it. It’s good to know that I still have some acting chops left.”

“Acting chops?  I thought you were dying, McKay!  What the hell was that?” 

“What do you mean ‘what the hell was that’?” Rodney’s voice rose in volume. “You know as well as I do what the hell that was.”

“No, I don’t.  I have no clue.” John spat back, taking a step forward.  “You’re going to have to enlighten me.”

Rodney reared back, as if he had been hit, his face turning hard.  John recognised the look in Rodney’s eyes, it was the same fight or flight look that he got when they were offworld and the shit was about to hit the fan.  John had never known flight to win out in that battle so he shouldn’t have been surprised when Rodney chose to stay and fight. 

It was the kiss that really surprised him.

One second Rodney’s eyes were hardening with the decision to fight and the next John’s back was hitting the wall behind him as Rodney crowded him, his mouth licking its way into John’s own.

John got with the program quickly, opening up to let Rodney’s tongue in, letting out a low moan as Rodney’s body pressed even closer.  It felt like he must be leaving a John shaped indent in the wall behind him but he didn’t care, not if the alternative meant that he would have to stop kissing Rodney.

John had spent a lot of time looking at Rodney’s mouth over the years, imagining the things it could do to him.  John rapidly came to the conclusion that his imagination sucked. Rodney kissed like he did everything else that mattered to him, with a dedicated focus and passion that didn’t allow for any mistakes and a need to learn every little detail of what he was doing.  John could almost hear the thoughts running across Rodney’s mind, the extrapolations he was making from the data;  _ if I touch John here he makes a small pleased hum; if I scrape my teeth over his bottom lip like this, his back arches at 18.3 degrees _ .  Feeling like a science experiment should have seemed cold and impersonal but it didn't.  It was the hottest thing John had ever had happen to him.

Another scrape of teeth and John shifted again, his back arching off the wall.  The shift in position had caused his legs to spread a bit wider and Rodney sighed happily as he slotted one of his legs in the small space between them.  John only had a couple of inches on Rodney but the slight height difference meant that Rodney’s hip was pressed tightly against John’s rock hard erection.  He could feel Rodney’s own hardness against his thigh and it would have taken a much stronger man than him not to start moving, grinding his cock against the warm weight of Rodney’s hip.

Rodney moaned approvingly into John’s mouth and followed suit, grinding back subtly against John’s leg.  Something in John’s mind roared approval at that and he pushed forward just long enough to flip their positions, crowding Rodney against the same space of wall that he had been pressed up against just moments before.

Rodney seemed to melt into the wall, all the aggression from earlier gone as he let John manhandle him into position.  Breaking the kiss, John breathed heavily, resting his forehead in the crook of Rodney’s neck, still grinding down into the meaty flesh of Rodney’s hip.

Rodney’s harsh breaths and shallow thrusts sang in counterpoint to John’s own and when Rodney breathed out his name in a small, wrecked voice, John couldn’t stop himself from tumbling over the edge.  He’d have felt embarrassed at coming in his trousers - something he hadn’t done since high school - except Rodney followed suit almost immediately afterwards, becoming even more boneless when he finished moaning John’s name.

John held him up, supporting his and Rodney’s weight with the help of the wall as they both struggled to catch their breath in the aftermath.

John moved his head, his lips skimming over Rodney’s neck in an approximation of a kiss and Rodney let out a low chuckle that shot right to John’s spent cock, making it twitch half-heartedly.

“That enlightening enough for you?” Rodney asked, his breath still coming in heavy gulps.

John laughed, long and hard.  Enlightening..that was one word for it.   _Screwed_ was another. There was no way he could go back to denying himself this again.

* * *

“You know that we won’t be able to sell this whole proximity problem thing forever, right?”

It was much later and Rodney’s voice was quiet in the stillness of the room, muffled by the way his face was leaning half against John’s chest.  It didn’t make his statement any less true.

“I know, buddy.”  John ran his fingers along the top of Rodney’s scalp, tracing patterns in his soft, surprisingly thick hair, not ready to stop touching him despite the fact that they had gotten off together three times in the past six hours.  

“I’m not ready for the excuse to touch you to be over,” Rodney continued, echoing John’s thoughts.  “I mean, I can live with hiding this thing between us eventually but it’s new and I’ve been waiting for it for so damn long and - -”

“So we make the most of it while we can,” John interrupted.  “Isn’t that why we lied to Carson in the first place?”

“Oh, so I did manage to enlighten you?  Took you long enough.” 

John could feel Rodney’s grin against his skin and already it was like his own smile was hardwired to respond.  

“I don’t know,” he drawled.  “I think I could use some more enlightening.”

* * *

John was suitably enlightened by the time he woke up the next morning but he let Rodney enlighten him some more before they showered just to be sure. There was no Elizabeth cockblocking them in the shower that morning and John, who had been conditioned by the USAF to take less than 3 minutes in the shower, was content to let the water run for close to a half hour while he mapped out every inch of Rodney’s body with a sponge.

They walked shoulder to shoulder, hands clasped together, to the mess hall for breakfast and stayed that way as they lined up for food.  No one even blinked an eye. Feeling bold, John placed his hand lower than was socially acceptable on Rodney’s back, grazing the top of Rodney’s ass as he guided them both towards their usual table.

Ronon and Teyla definitely noticed but neither of them said anything, although John was pretty sure he saw Teyla kick Ronon under the table to keep it that way.

“You look well rested,” Teyla said, causing Ronon to snort.  She glared at him before continuing. “Dr Beckett informed us yesterday of the - - _unfortunate_ news regarding your condition.  I am pleased to see you both handle it so well.”

Rodney was busy shovelling food in his mouth to answer - probably a good thing if the flaming heat on his cheeks was anything to go by.  There was no way he could lie to Teyla with a straight face. 

To be honest, John wasn’t sure he could lie to her either but after considering his words for a second he realised he didn’t have to.

“We’re making the most of it,” he replied. John struggled to keep the smirk off his face as Rodney almost choked on his breakfast.

“I am glad to hear it,” Teyla smiled.  “I trust we’ll see you both at the senior staff meeting this afternoon?”

“Unless you need some more rest,” Ronon butted in, drawing another glare from Teyla.

“We’ll be there with bells on,” John promised.   “Save us a seat.”

* * *

John’s meeting with Lorne - which was, by necessity, now John and Rodney’s meeting with Lorne - had been rescheduled to that morning but, to keep up appearances, they agreed to visit Radek in his labs first.

“I was starting to worry that you had killed each other,” Radek said in greeting.

John grinned easily, picking a relatively clear spot of the table to lean against, Rodney slotting himself neatly beside him.  “You know, Rodney, if I were you I’d be offended by just how many people think that 24 hours in your company would make someone snap and kill you.”

“Ah, I am not the first to suggest such a thing?”

“Ronon made the same hilarious joke,” Rodney snapped.  “And the fact that you’re operating at the same level of humour as Conan the Barbarian is an appalling testament to your higher brain function.  Now, how close are you to fixing this thing because, and let me tell you, if anyone is close to murder right now it certainly isn’t him.”

John bit down on a smirk, watching Rodney’s amateur dramatics at work.  It certainly seemed to mollify Radek, who fiddled with the frame of his glasses and turned his focus to the readouts on his monitor.

“I have been able to find note of the device in the Ancient database but the file is heavily corrupted.”  Radek gestured at the screen with a disdainful wave, moving gracefully aside when Rodney pushed his way in to look.

John shifted, moving with Rodney, and peered over his shoulders at what looked like a whole load of smoke and gibberish to him.  He never had gotten the hang of written Ancient although he could decipher it by ear if pushed. Rodney made a humming sound and tapped at the keyboard for a few moments before seeming to take Radek at his word.

“Fine, it’s corrupted,” he said, turning around to look at Radek, John still pressed close against his side  “So, what’s your next step?”

Radek looked between him and Rodney curiously before answering.  “Dr Brennan has written a program that will attempt to complete the information based on extrapolated data from the remaining fragments but...I am sorry, forgive me but did Dr Beckett not say that the negative stimuli was triggered at a distance of greater than six feet?”

“Fantastic, going over information we already know,” Rodney sighed.  “Yes, yes, that’s correct. Why?”

Radek gestured between the two of them - or rather, at the lack of space between the two of them.  “Is much closer than six feet, ano?”

“Give the man a Nobel, he can measure distance.”  

John elbowed Rodney in the ribs, a warning to cool down.  “Better safe than sorry Doc,” he shrugged. “McKay here is a bit paranoid that the safe distance might fluctuate over time and, well, experimenting on the absolute limit isn’t my idea of a good time so…”

“Of course,” Radek looked chastised at the reminder of the crippling pain (the fake crippling pain at this point but he didn’t know that).  “We are getting closer,” he promised. 

“Yes, well, don’t rush it,” Rodney said.  At Radek’s surprised look and John’s elbow, he rushed to continue.  “I mean, yes, _of course_ , fix this as quickly as possible but don’t let everything else fall behind.  The, ah, the diagnostics on jumper seven need finishing and the, ah, the generator recalibration in sector 17 - - “

“Is all under control, Rodney,” Radek interrupted.  “Now, the sooner you and Colonel Sheppard leave, the sooner I can go back to fixing this.”

Rodney paused, making no move to leave and - honestly - John didn’t blame him.  He would have stood there all day if it meant keeping Rodney in touching distance for a bit longer but Radek was a smart guy, he’d see through that eventually.

John grabbed Rodney’s elbow and pulled.  “That’s our cue to leave, McKay.”

“It is?  I mean, yes, it is.  Um, get back to work,” he called over his shoulder to Zelenka as John pulled him out the room.  John glanced back before the door slid shut to see Radek sitting back down on his stool, a bemused look on his face, and start to work.

John could almost see the expiry timer on their plan counting down.

They needed to make the most of this while they still could.

* * *

Lorne’s office was nice.  John thought it might actually be nicer than his own quarters.  It was certainly nicer than his office which only qualified as an office in the loosest sense of the word.  John suspected that his office may have been a storage closet at one point but considering he could count on both hands the number of hours he had spent there since coming to Atlantis it was a moot point.  

Lorne’s office had a real, honest to goodness couch in it; set in front of a low - but not too low - coffee table.  John ignored the two hard-backed visitor chairs facing Lorne’s desk and sat at the couch, pulling Rodney down with him.  The heat of Rodney’s body pressed against him sent a little thrill down John’s spine. The fact that they were practically sitting in each other’s lap while in the same room as his second in command was thrilling in a different kind of way.  As guilty as the lying thing made him feel, John couldn’t deny it had its benefits.

Lorne, for his part, didn’t even seem to notice.

“Can I get you some coffee, Dr McKay?” Lorne asked, always the perfect host.  He even had a plate of biscuits set out on the coffee table - John suspected that he may have even baked them himself.

“As tempting as instant garbage is, I brought my own.” Rodney shook his travel mug which was still about two thirds full if the sloshing of liquid was to be believed.  

“Just call out if you change your mind, Doc.” 

John, who knew exactly how good the coffee Lorne made was, exchanged a smirk with his second.  They both knew that Rodney would change his tune once he smelled their own cups.

John and Lorne got down to the work of finalising the off-world mission rota for the coming week while Rodney hunched over his tablet, tapping away furiously at the tiny keyboard, completely ignoring them both.

The smell of the coffee distracted him from his work long enough to demand a cup (and the name of Lorne’s supplier) and notice the biscuits.  Once he had his coffee and sugary treat he went happily back to tapping away at the tablet while John and Lorne hashed out the details of who would be covering for Sgt Moore’s team while they were in the infirmary and which team had drawn the short straw and would have to attend the monthly rebirth ceremony on PU9-HJG.  

That was one food trade that John wished they hadn’t secured.  The fruit the villagers harvested was delicious but the requirement to attend the monthly ceremony was the worst detail a team could get on the city.

“And what about AR-1?” Lorne asked as they were wrapping up.

“What about us?” Rodney chimed in, his head popping up from behind his computer.

“Well, I just mean that you’re grounded at the moment until Drs Beckett and Zelenka can fix whatever that device did to you.”

“Yes, yes, yes, with the excruciating pain.  Your point?.”

Lorne frowned.  “We don’t know how long this will take to resolve so we should probably put some contingency plans in place for your mission timetable.”

“But we’re not scheduled for a mission until next week,” Rodney argued.  “We’ll be fine by then.”

“You will?” Lorne raised his eyebrows in surprise.  

John moved his foot to press down on Rodney’s own foot in a gentle warning.  “I think what McKay’s trying to say is that we  _ hope _ we’ll be fine by then.  No point borrowing trouble Major.”

“Of course, sir.”  Lorne turned his back on them, clearing the cups and plates from their coffee and biscuits.  “We’ll revisit the discussion next week if need be.”

“You do this every week?” Rodney asked in surprise.  

“The scientists aren’t the only people who work you know,” John said.

“I don’t mean that. “ Rodney poked John in the stomach.  “You get good coffee and biscuits every week and you didn’t tell me?”

“Hey, it’s not every week.”  John batted Rodney’s vicious finger away.  “Sometimes it’s danishes instead.”

“Danishes?!” Rodney’s voice rose sharply in disbelief. “That’s it.  You are so getting it later.”

A crash of ceramic-ware breaking on the floor pulled John’s attention from Rodney to Lorne who was moving to crouch on the floor to pick up the broken shards of a shattered cup.

“You ok there, Lorne? Want a hand?”

Lorne’s voice sounded slightly strangled as he answered, still facing away from them.  “I’ve got it, Sir. Why don’t you and McKay head out? I’ll see you both in the senior meeting in an hour.”

John would have stayed and helped anyway but Rodney was practically pulling him out the door.  “If you’re sure,” he called out, practically over his shoulder.

They were already out with the door sliding closed behind them before Lorne could answer.

“You in some kind of hurry?” he asked Rodney.

“You’re not?  The way I see it we have exactly one hour of free time before we get stuck in the senior staff meeting for the rest of the afternoon, followed by an hour in the infirmary and then I have to at least show my face in the labs at some point.”  Rodney smirked. “Do you have any idea the things I could do to in sixty minutes?”

Well, when he put it like that…John pulled Rodney into the nearest storage closet, crowding him against the shelves of stationery.

“A bit on the nose isn’t  it?” Rodney asked, looking at their surroundings.

“Shut up and enlighten me some more.”

Rodney grinned, dropping to his knees and moving to pull at John’s fly.

John’s head hit the back of the door with a thunk.   _ Jesus Christ, _ he thought.  He should suggest to Teyla that Rodney take over her meditation classes because Rodney’s method of enlightenment was a hell of a lot more fun than hers.  

“Jesus, fuck, Rodney.”  John hissed in pleasure as Rodney’s teeth scraped ever so softly over the sensitive head of his cock.

On second thoughts, maybe it would be better to keep this particular brand of enlightenment to himself.

* * *

They were late for the senior staff meeting.

It wasn’t the sex itself that made them late, more the state of Rodney’s hair after John had spent a good portion of their hour pulling at it.  Unlike John’s own head of hair, which existed in a permanent state of ‘just been fucked’, Rodney’s dishevelled tufts would have been a dead give away of what they had just spent the past hour doing.

A quick detour to John’s quarters to raid his bathroom cabinet for hair gel (“Aha, I knew you used this stuff!”) put them behind schedule and had them walking into the conference room six minutes after the meeting was supposed to start.

“So nice of you to join us, gentlemen,” Elizabeth chided gently.  “We were starting to worry.”

John grinned, feeling easy and loose - it was wonderful what a good hour of happy times could bring out.  “Sorry about that Elizabeth. Something came up.”

Elizabeth’s smile took on a slightly pinched look as she busied herself with the open agenda file on her tablet.

“Well, now that you’re both here why don’t you take a seat?”

Rodney, who had been pouring himself a cup of coffee from the thermos on the table, made a beeline for the first open chair he could see, sitting down with a comfortable huffing sound.  

John frowned, looking around the table and noticing the absence of any other free seats. 

“What?  Are we having some kind of chair shortage?” He turned to look at Ronon.  “I told you to save us a seat.”

“I did save you a seat.  McKay’s sitting on it.”

“Very mature.” John sighed.

“Gentlemen?  If you’re ready?  We’re all busy people.”

“You’re right, Elizabeth.  I’m sorry.” John smiled widely and sat directly on Rodney’s lap.  “Continue.”

Rodney immediately brought his arms around John’s waist to lie in John’s lap, pulling him more securely against Rodney’s broad chest.  It wasn’t exactly comfortable but it was  _ Rodney _ and John was starting to realise that he couldn’t ever get enough Rodney.  One look at the pleased look on Rodney’s face and John knew he felt the same.

“Oh, for - Ronon, would you get him his own chair?”  

Ronon, who was trying valiantly not to laugh, left the room and came back with a chair which he placed next to Rodney.  John reluctantly shifted to it, scooting it closer to Rodney as he did.

Elizabeth sighed.  “While we all appreciate how well you are both handling the effects of this mishap, can you at least try to look like this isn’t the best thing that’s ever happened to you?  At least for Colonel Caldwell’s sake. The Daedalus is due to arrive tomorrow in case you’d forgotten.”

With that one exchange, an exchange filed with fond exasperation, an exchange that cut through John's happiness like a knife, John’s loose-limbed, post-coital glow disappeared in an instant.  His muscles tensed, his back snapping to attention as he untangled his leg from Rodney so quickly that he kicked the table. 

This wasn’t in the plan.  There was a fine line between people thinking that they were making the best of a bad situation and people thinking they were revelling in it.  This was his career, this was - - it was the entire reason he’d never done anything about his attraction to Rodney in the first place, it was - - he was still sitting too close, fuck.  John scooted his chair as far to the left as it could go without hitting Teyla, the scraping sound loud in the sudden silence of the room.

“Well, would you look at that?” Rodney’s voice interrupted John’s panic. “It looks like the effects have worn off after all.  Perhaps you were right about the protein markers Carson, maybe there was just a small delay.”

Rodney sounded off, his voice shaking slightly behind his obvious bravado.  John couldn’t bring himself to look, couldn’t risk anyone seeing something in that look that couldn’t be explained by a stupidly convenient accident with an ancient device.

“John, Rodney - -” Elizabeth’s voice was filled with regret as she tried to take back the past few moments.

“If you don’t mind Elizabeth, now that I can safely stray more than a few feet from Colonel Sheppard I have lots of catching up to do in the labs.  If you’ll excuse me.”

Rodney’s chair scraped the floor as he all but ran from the room.  John didn’t experience the bone splitting pain from the other day but that didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt.  

Ronon and Carson’s chairs were next to scrape against the tile as they both headed after Rodney, the meeting forgotten.  John kept his head down, kept looking at the table. He heard other people leave, thought he heard Elizabeth whisper a soft apology as she left and finally, he figured he was alone in the room until he felt Teyla’s hand land gently on his shoulder.

John flinched away from it, standing up abruptly, his back to the wall.

“John,” she said, her voice low and soothing as if she was talking to a small child.  “We are friends, team, family. You cannot possibly believe that we would not be happy for you and Dr McKay.”

“There is no me and McKay.”  John shook his head. He felt his legs give out on him and slid down the wall until he was sitting on the floor.  “Not after that.”

“You were taken by surprise.  Rodney will understand that when he has had time to cool off.”

“Did you know the whole time?” John asked.  God, how stupid had they been? 

Teyla smiled sadly.  “I have known for years, John.”

John had meant how long had she known they were faking the effects of the device but Teyla’s answer was a hell of a lot more telling.  When he fucked up, he really fucked up.

“I don’t - - do you think I can fix this?”  He looked beseechingly at Teyla.

“Let us help you,” she smiled.  “That is what family does.”

* * *

Rodney’s door didn’t open for him.  John was so used to it sliding open as he approached that he almost walked straight into it and only just avoided a broken nose.

John drew in a breath and waved his hand over the Ancient equivalent of a doorbell, hearing the dim whisper of a chime through the thick door.  Ronon answered it, large and looming; his face not getting any friendlier when he saw who was waiting.

“Hey, big guy,” John tried for charm.  “Can I see him?”

Ronon twisted in the door, blocking John’s attempt to see past him. “Depends,” he said.  “You gonna let your baggage hurt him again?”

“I’m...my  _ baggage _ ?  Where did you even hear that...never mind, look.”  John sighed. “I fucked up. I know that. But I’m not gonna be able to fix it until you let me in.”

“Let him in.”

John felt a surge of hope as Rodney’s voice drifted out from the room.

Ronon turned, frowning, to look over his shoulder.  “You sure?”

Rodney must have made some sort of hand gesture that convinced Ronon he was sure because Ronon stepped aside without John hearing an answer.

“You want me to stay?” he asked Rodney.  John tried not to be offended that Ronon thought Rodney needed a chaperone to be alone with him but Rodney was offended enough for the both of them.

“No, I do not want you to stay, you big oaf!  In fact, I’ve been trying to get you to leave me alone all afternoon.  Now, shoo, the grown-ups are talking.”

Ronon shrugged Rodney’s dramatics off, swiped a chocolate bar from Rodney’s stash - deaf to Rodney’s demands that he put it back this instant - and left.  John didn’t think he’d go far though. He wouldn’t be surprised if Ronon stood outside in the corridor until he was sure that no violence broke out.

Rodney didn’t look close to violence.  He looked defeated and small, hunched over the small couch against the far wall opposite his bed and - - John didn’t think it was possible to feel more guilty than he already did but apparently it was.  

He swallowed, trying to inject moisture into his suddenly dry mouth.  “Look, Rodney,” he began. He should have known Rodney would barely let him get a word in edgeways.

“Save it.  I know you’re sorry.  I know you had a massive panic induced freak out, no doubt thinking that Elizabeth was about to report you to the military police or something equally ridiculous.”

God, but Rodney knew how to wind him up.  “It’s not ridiculous,” John snapped back, offended.  “It’s my damn career. It’s the past twenty years of my damn life and - - “ John grabbed control of his temper and reigned it in. “I fucked up.  I know that. It’s just that this past couple of days - being able to touch you when I want, to just sit next to you without having to watch how close I was sitting or being wary of how often I was touching you - - it was - it made me forget the rest of it.  Caldwell and the damn code of conduct and - -”

Rodney stood, crossing the few feet between them until he was close enough to touch John’s face.  John bit down on a whimper at the feeling of Rodney’s hand on his skin. It was absolutely ridiculous that after all the closeness of the past two days he could already feel touch starved but that didn’t make it any less true.

“You’re an idiot, you know that?”  Rodney’s hand moved, his thumb running across John’s lips.  John opened his mouth to suckle on it briefly, enjoying the low moan of pleasure Rodney made.  “What the hell did you think was going to happen when we dropped the ruse?”

John let Rodney’s thumb go with a pop.  “The ruse?” he teased. “What are we, old-time con men?”  He let Rodney push him against the wall, an almost direct mirror of how things had happened last night.  “I would have compartmentalised it eventually,” he said, spreading his legs a bit wider, his breath hitching as Rodney’s thigh slid in the space he was creating. 

“Compartmentalised what?” Rodney said, his breath tickling at John’s neck.

“The need to touch, to stay close to you every second.  A day or two more was all I needed.”

Rodney ground gently down on John’s leg, the sweet, sweet friction practically unbearable.  

“Guess I screwed that plan up, huh?  I kinda let the cat out of the bag on our ‘get out of jail free’ card.”

John groaned loudly as Rodney’s grinding started to pick up pace.  

“Actually,” he panted, “I think I have a solution to that?”

Rodney pulled back a bit, his eyebrow raised.  “Oh, yeah? Why don’t you enlighten me?”

John was happy to finally be the one doing the enlightening.

* * *

Caldwell beamed down in a flash of white light as per usual, always wanting to make an entrance instead of just disembarking when the Daedalus docked like the rest of his crew.  

The showboating didn’t bother John quite so much today.  

“Colonel Caldwell,” he drawled, “good to see you.”

Caldwell stopped short when he caught sight of him, his face taking on a pinched look.  “ _ Lt. _ Colonel Sheppard,” he greeted pointedly.  “Is there some kind of chair shortage that I don’t know about?”  

John grinned, folding his arms across his chest and making himself more comfortable in Rodney’s lap.  Rodney, for his part, was smiling smugly, one hand proprietarily holding on to John's thigh, anchoring him in place.  The fact that no one in the control room seemed to bat an eyelid was the icing on the cake.

“Funny story, sir,” he said.  “McKay and I are suffering some side effects from a recent misfire with an ancient device.  It’s the damnedest thing. Seems we have to spend a certain amount of time a day in close physical contact with each other to combat the effects.”

“Really?” It was Caldwell’s turn to fold his arms over his chest.  

“Really,” John agreed.  “I even have a doctors note.”  He pulled Carson’s gift to them - his and Teyla’s way of helping John fix the mess he made - out of his breast pocket and waved it at Caldwell.

Caldwell looked less pinched and more resigned now.  “Of course you do,” he sighed. “Is this….condition having any impeding effect on the operation of the base or your team?”

“Nope,” John answered with a grin.  

“Of course it isn’t.”  Caldwell turned to look at Elizabeth.  “Given Colonel Sheppard’s current indisposition, why don’t we postpone the debrief until 1500.”  He cast an appraising eye over John. “I take it your..physical contact requirements will allow for that?”

“Sounds like a plan, sir.  See you at 1500 hours.” John waved Caldwell off as the soldier left the control room with a huff.  He turned to grin at Rodney. “That was kinda fun.”

Rodney hummed in agreement.  “You realise of course that he knows it’s a load of crap?”

John shrugged.  “Knowing and proving are two very different things.”  He hopped off Rodney’s lap and groaned, popping his back as the two of them headed back to work.  “You know, you’re not very comfortable for a chair. Remind me why I sat on your lap instead of you sitting on mine?  I am taller you know..”

“By barely an inch!  At least my lap has some padding, you’re all bones and angles, I’d probably need a chiropractor after sitting on your lap.”

“You say the sweetest things,” John deadpanned.  “See you at lunch?” he asked when they reached the transporter.  John was on his way to the armoury which was in a completely different branch of the city than Rodney’s labs.

“Depends.” Rodney made a show of thinking it over.  “One chair or two?”

“Had enough of me, McKay?”

Rodney’s eyes softened, the teasing gone as he leaned in for a small kiss, barely more than a press of the lips.

“Never,” he promised.  “You?”

John felt his heart skip a step.

“Never.”  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to jayi on LJ for the wonderful art that inspired this. This story popped into my head almost fully formed when I saw it and it was a lot of fun to write.
> 
> Also, big thanks to otherearthsoutthere for her beta duties on this. Any remaining mistakes are 1000% my own!


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